or how I reached terminal velocity over the Swiss Alps…
We arrived in amazing Switzerland to be greeted by breathtaking ranges meandering out over the horizon, with natural beauty to rival New Zealand landscapes. We were also greeted by Switzerland pricings… After getting accustomed to things being reasonably priced in Paris and Germany, Switzerland prices were a real wake up call. The rumours hadn’t been exaggerated. Boy, my bank account was going to feel it that’s for sure.
Though, soon the cost of living was to take a back seat to rumblings and rumours that there was to be an opportunity to go sky diving from a helicopter over the Swiss Alps. They didn’t have to ask twice as I signed up for this death defying activity in the blink of an eye. Here was my opportunity to tick off two items from my bucket list! Go for a ride in a helicopter and perform a sky dive. Ryan my trusty sidekick as always, signed up too (or signed his death warrant, we would soon find out). This was going to be our biggest adventure yet!
We had an amazing dinner the evening we arrived, and the night before our upcoming baptism of fire. Our last meal perhaps? Maybe that’s why it tasted like heaven on earth, who knows. We were served meals made by the expert Top Deck catering team. A mouth-watering chicken in a mushroom sauce topped off with traditional diced Swiss potatoes, which really blew all our minds. I had thirds. Heck the way I saw it; if I was going to make a crater tomorrow, I might as well do so with a full tummy.
Early next morning, the Gods smiled on us as we were greeted with spectacular weather, foggyish but still clear enough that we would be able to see the ground hurtling towards us at terminal velocity. For those who don’t know, terminal velocity is the maximum speed the human body can travel through the air before air friction prevents it travelling any further. It was going to be a good day to die I contemplated.
Suited up and ready to fly, we awaited for our mighty chariot to fly us into the heavens and to destiny! The familiar buzzing sound of a helicopter coming in to land suddenly caught our attention. Steffan (the owner of Skydive XDream) wandered up to us and mentioned that their dinner was arriving. Honestly, the first thing that popped into my mind was, “hold on, these Swiss are pretty extreme to be flying in their curries for dinner” – I don’t know why, but it did, more due to the fact that we had to wake up at 5ish for the jump, and my usually razor sharp mind was as blunt and effective as a plastic butter knife on a concrete wall.
All of a sudden a flying reindeer flew into sight… No I was not high on the aviation fumes (well I’m mostly sure I wasn’t), and I was pretty sure it wasn’t Christmas time? If it was, I was probably better off with the parachute not opening, rather than face my moms’ wrath at not coming home for Christmas. No one else seemed surprised, as the reindeer came in for a landing, still fresh with grass still hanging out of its mouth. Theres fresh, and theres Swiss fresh I deliberated. There was no more time to consider whether children around the world were going to miss out on presents this Christmas, as we were jostled to our helicopter with military efficiency and German accented words of encouragement of “GO! GO! GO!!!” One could almost hear air raid sirens screeching out in ones head as we dove into the open doors of our helicopter.
Admittedly, I hadn’t really been nervous till the second I actually jumped into the helicopter. That immediately changed as soon as the engine sprang into life like, and shrieked like a berserk banshee out for blood. I could feel the adrenalin pour into my blood stream, my heart started pounding, and it felt like it would burst out of my chest at any moment. My breathing became shallower and sharper as the pilot whipped the banshee and spurred it on, causing it lurch into the air with a howl, in search of more terrified prey.
We careened between the sheer cliff walls of the valley, darting from crevice to crevice. All the while, I expected to meet our doom against the unforgiving cold rock face of the valley instead of the warm welcoming grounds of mother earth at the end of our fall. Luckily for us, the talented pilot and his trusty banshee were too good for the crushing death embrace of the valley and we shot out from the valley and its life ending cloud cover like a cork ascending to freedom. The views to behold were utterly astounding, with the Swiss Alps at spread all around us.
However, there wasn’t much time to let it all soak in as the helicopter door swung open and air rushed in, threatening to suck us out into oblivion. Not that it needed any help as we made our own way to the railing. Before I could get my bearings; the horizon suddenly swam past my peripheral vision, the crescendo of rushing air meeting my ears and face. We were free falling, soaring and diving like splendid eagles (or so id like to think). In reality, I looked more like a Saint Bernard that had just chased a cat into a wind tunnel. Mostly due to the fact that I was grinning from ear to ear and had air rushing into my mouth like the intake of a 747s engine. Id most likely have to photoshop that out in the videos later.
After what seemed like seconds, our death defying dive suddenly came to a halt as there was a loud crack like a whip, and our parachute clawed out at the all encompassing air that was to slow our fall. Then there was silence, as the only sound was the air gently breezing past us as we floated to the tarmac. As I looked up I saw Ryan had also successfully survived the drop and was making his way to friendly territory. There ended our first of many adrenalin fuelled adventures, to top of the rest of our day we made our way up to the top of Europe, or Jungfrau, which after our recent flight didn’t really seem so high anymore.
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